A hidden chapter for ‘The Catcher in The Rye’

I re-read one of my favorite books I have read and I thought it would be fun to do a hidden chapter, this was written as like a flashback thinking about the day of his dead brothers funeral. I tried to write in in the style of J.D Salinger. It was really fun, I may do another one, suggestions would be great.

I got off my lousy ass, it was the day I was dreading, the funeral. I had to wear this lousy suit and meet some phony people. Today is not what I want, I obviously miss Allie but I don’t want to see people who really didn’t know her like I did. Goddamn I miss him, I miss his fiery red hair, I miss his genuine acts of kindness, not like people like now being kind to gain something from someone, that really annoys me, and I hate phony people.

When I was getting ready my family were waiting, I didn’t want to talk to anyone, but I knew people would want to talk to me, it was just a matter of time before D.B came upstairs he sat on my bed with tears down his eyes, that killed me but I did not want to show any emotion, well I would but I don’t think I can show any, it was hard to digest that he died.

‘I know you loved her more than anyone else, but she will always be looking down on you’ D.B said in a quiet voice. I hated what he said it was so corny, and I don’t think he will be watching down me, I just don’t believe that, it seems bogus. I didn’t reply I just sort of nodded a bit and looked through the mirror to give him a bit of eye contact to know I acknowledged him. He was full on crying, my heart dropped, I didn’t know what to do, I wanted to walk out of the room but that would be rude wouldn’t it?, I couldn’t handle , I just walked out I felt kinda sorry but I needed time alone.

So I was ready and after that awkward exchange with my older brother D.B. I really wasn’t looking forward to the funeral, but then again who looks forward to these things. But anyways I was  in the car going to the funeral looking outside everything and everyone seemed more annoying, like everyone on the street were looking more phony and fake than ever. I was thinking no one can be like Allie, he was amazing. It was cramped in the car we had to get a lot of people to go there my Mum and Dad went in another car because they were particularly upset, I know that Allie was their favorite child I don’t blame them.

My auntie was sitting there staring at me, right at my face ‘Holden, how are you doing’ she said in a stern voice, she was one of those relatives that said it how it is and she sometimes seemed cold hearted, I like that though. ‘I am ok I guess, just trying not to think about it’, in my head I was thinking what kind of question is that; I knew she was trying to make conversation but really? ‘Well if you need any…advice or anything then I am here’.                                                                                               ‘I think it will be ok’. And that was that. We sat in the car for the remainder of the journey in silence.

We were in the church and I sat down at the front, I was looking round it was a big turnout, but then again it was Allie, so I was not too surprised, I saw Old Mary Hive, our next door neighbor, she was a very old fragile lady, I didn’t like to talk to her because it felt like if I talked too loud she would fall over, she seemed that fragile, she knew Allie well enough to be here unlike others like Mr. Martini who lived opposite me, he was a very snobby man, he worked as a business man for some phony business agency, I don’t know exactly what he does but I should know he was one of those guys that always bragged but of course I never listened to him, he is so full of himself it makes me sick.

The service started and every emotion I have been hiding finally comes out, I start crying uncontrollably and that makes D.B Phoebe and my mum and dad cry to, I could not stop crying, the realization final hit me, I didn’t want life without Allie, he was one of those positives in life.

I couldn’t control it I had to get out of here, everything become hot I felt dizzy I got up and left for the door. My mum grabbed my hand and I looked at her and I said ‘Leave me alone, I just want to be alone for once’ I do admit it was pretty loud but I couldn’t help it I needed some space. I walked outside and grabbed a cigarette from my pocket and lit it up and I looked at it, Allie wouldn’t approve of this. I threw it on the floor and stamped it out aggressively, I didn’t know what to do. Some kid came out and looked at me, he was about two years younger than me, he starts talking to me, everything he said was absolutely bullshit, it winded me up so much and wanted to punch him on the nose maybe then he would stop talking. I did it, he started bleeding uncontrollably he screamed and looked at the blood. He collapsed to the floor, I freaked out, I wanted to hit him but not that hard, ‘shit’ I said out loud. I got scared and I ran home, from then on out my life has been grey, nothing positive events in my life made me smile, except of course thinking about Allie.

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A Short story

The crunch I felt beneath my feet. as I drifted through the busy New York streets, occasionally accidentally shoulder barging someone as they turned around and muttered schmuck about me whilst staring me down like a hawk, the best thing to do in that situation is just walk on. That happened once in a while every time I walk back home from school. But the streets were busier recently because of Christmas, I never really had any sort of Christmas ever, my family is so damn dysfunctional that we all spend them separately in each room, I’m use to it now, at least it is quiet. I had to pick up some milk for Ma but my local corner shop was closed so I had to do some extra walking uptown, It’s not a safe place to be but I learned you keep your head down and mind your own business those thugs will leave you be, Don’t wear anything flashy too.

I walked through the door and a surge of warmth hits me, highlight of my day so far; I take my hat and gloves off and walk past the counter

‘Hey Jimmy, Long time no see eh? How you been? How’s your family?’

I got pretty annoyed I know I don’t come here to often but at least try to attempt to get anywhere near my name, he sounded so confident saying Jimmy when it’s actually Franklin, but everyone calls me Frankie, I hate that darn name it sounds like I’m in the mafia like this Schmuck.

‘Frankie man, it’s Frankie, I’m good, everyone is good! How’s business treating you Joey?

‘Sorry man you know an old man like me is forgetful’

He wasn’t that old, late 30’s early 40’s,tops.

‘But Frankie you know business is picking up; the shops down your era are constantly havin’ to close down so more for me right!’

‘Yeah I guess man, look I’m in a hurry I need to get some milk, my Mum is going to be pissed if I’m late’

I quickly got bored so that was my excuse, I paid for it wished him then put my hat and gloves back on then jogged home because I was late. After a while I got tired so I started to walk again, only a 3-4 minute walk, but I wanted to get home quick it get’s rowdy at this time in New York, I’m already hearing sirens, but that’s no big deal I hear it constantly all night accompanied by his good friend Mr. Gunshots.

I finally arrive, digging down my pocket for a key, turns out it was on the other pocket and when I open the door I get a big surprise.

Summer time

Riding our bikes downhill towards the lake, it’s a hot summers evening and we are all having a blast. A couple of friends have gone, it’s just 5 of us now, we are not saying anything…we are just listening, listening to the wind blow against our faces and as confused as we are with our real life, things have never been clearer than it is now, everything makes sense. 

As we enter the forest we hear birds chirping, the wind has calmed down now, everything is calm; we automatically all slow down looking around enjoying everything that is around us. Taking this moment in, because we know this moment… This feeling it will never come back to us, even if we try and recreate what we have done this night, it won’t feel the same. Our smiles have faded away slightly, not because we have lost some sense of happiness, it just has faded away, the look of content and admiration has swallowed our faces, a different kind of happiness. Where we are right now, who we are with, these are the moments that we will not forget.  

SPREAD THOSE WINGS

Do you live in a box

but you want to get out and fly

but you are scared what people may think

but in reality they are scared also

they are scared of someone that has dreams

they are scared of going against the normal ways

they will put you down because they don’t understand

they are not willing to open themselves up to understand

but that’s them, this is you

you have dreams

you have goals

you want to go somewhere in your life that no one has ever been

remember success is not about money or respect

sure that could be apart of what you think is success

but really success is just being happy

that’s my dream

and slowly im getting there day by day

so should you

spread your wings

keep flapping

you will get there one day

– Omar Khan

#MotivationalMondays

p.s. thanks to my followers (yes i’m looking at you 5) hopefully you have joined the start of something great!

Have a great day 🙂

The sound of laughter (Happy national poetry day)

Laughter, the anthem of happiness

There are different types of laughter

but they all have the same meaning

you can laugh with your friends and with your family

some people may think your laugh is weird

I have that problem

for a man with a beard my laugh is very girlish

I like it though

it makes me happy seeing people I don’t even know laughing

laughing is  contagious

and we all want it to spread.

HAPPY NATIONAL POETRY DAY, my favorite thing about poetry is that poetry can be anything you want it to be, for example this poem, It just what I feel no rhyming or any techniques just what I feel.

Thank you for reading and have a happy positive day 🙂